Mascots Amuse Me

Okay, I'll admit it - I have a love of massively-headed anthropomorphic mascots. I'm not so much as interested in ones from the sports world as I am the ones who roam theme parks such as Walt Disney World, Carowinds, King's Dominion, Six Flags, and so on ... but until then, this slide show of "Mascots Gone Wild" (sorry - none of them go topless or bottomless, darn the luck) will have to suffice. Thanks to the corporate overlords over at MSN.com for the swiped photo link below.

Sneaking In The Back Door?

As a writer of licensed property tie-in projects both famous (most recently Kung Fu Panda and Madagascar: Back 2 Africa), and obscure, I find the tone and quotes in this article insulting (please click the link and go read before continuing to enjoy my rant).

"Sneaked in the back door of publishing as a writer-for-hire," is how Judy Blundell categorized her career as an author before the publication of her first non-licensed novel. I'm not disputing the merit of the book (after all, it did win the National Book Award for Young People's Literature), but apparently she doesn't look upon the 100 or so books written up to this point favorably, choosing to use a pseudonym instead of her own name to sign the work.

I imagine doing so has hurt me at times, but I've always used my real name on projects. The only time a pseudonym has been on the cover of something I've written is due to the publisher (as in the case of the Deathlands novels I wrote under the house name of "James Axler"). I do agree with Blundell about "losing your writer's voice" by continually toiling in the creative houses of licensed properties, but I hardly see shame in the work done there either. Good work is good work, and should be recognized as such.

Six Degrees of Ron Howard's Hairpiece

See more Ron Howard videos at Funny or Die

The Many Humiliations of Illya Kuryakin Part 1

... See the glum expression being worn by our pal Illya in the cover photo? Perhaps he is sad at having his head confined in a tiny box, while fellow agent Napoleon Solo gets the full body glory shot, but I think it is because he read the script for this issue and wonders what fresh indignities will be thrust upon him next within the U.N.C.L.E. organization.

Don't feel bad, Illya. James Bond also has clown make-up on his resume (although I think you remain the only member of the 1960's spy fraternity to be shot out of a cannon). As witnessed in both story and cover blurb of Gold Key's The Man From U.N.C.L.E. #13.

He's A Rock - It - Man!

Most lovers of hammy actors who also like to sing (but should never have gone near a recording studio) have heard or seen Big Bill Shatner's take on Elton John's Rocket Man, right? A combination of low-tech video special effects and a disintegrating tuxedo - who needs a malfunctioning transporter to deliver multiple Shatners?

But ... have you seen TV cult fave Chris Eliott's take on the tune (and the performance)? Chris answers the question "Can a parody of a performance that was already a parody the moment it aired still be funny?" with a resounding, "Affirmative!"

And finally, here's Stewie Griffin's attempt to out-Shatner Shatner. Talk about in-jokes most teenagers wouldn't get (which does dispel the notion that Family Guy is aimed exclusively at adolescent males). Same goes for all of those musical comedy gags and references as well!

Reason Number 288 ...

...why William Shatner will always be my all-time favorite actor.

Meeting John Waters

Taken September 21, 2006 at the Carolina Theatre in Greensboro, North Carolina. JW looks dapper (as always) after spending two solid hours discussing his life, career, films and other topics of interest on stage. Waters once had actor Steve Buscemi pose for his annual Christmas Card mailing as "John Waters," but I think a receding hairline that has revealed an incredibly elongated forehead puts him more into looking like a sinister Don Knotts. He also looks oh so tiny next to the lumbering mass o' moi in this photo. If I look worse for wear, it is because I had taught a middle school English class all day before making the drive into downtown G'boro for the event. Not caught by the camera is my freshly signed first edition of Waters' book of essays, Shock Value, which I discovered eons ago at a used bookstore near Mims, Florida. My love of Waters isn't driven by his legendary film career, but rather from his writing (go figure) ... an oddity that I equate with my love of the music of The Monkees, but indifference to the television show. I think both have to do with how I discovered both Waters and Papa Nez, Davy, Peter and Micky - Waters via his first book (before seeing any of the movies), and the pre-fab four via their albums (after having dismissed the series as a kid).