Model Home

So ... I read Eric Puchner's Model Home in a rush of two days this week (an impressive rate with my schedule these days) and I have to say, it was beautifully written and touched me in ways that are still resonating. I know I saw many elements of my own marriage reflected in the prose, and suspect you will as well if you take my advice and read this frequently laugh-out-loud funny novel. I guess that is why it affected me as much as it did. I kept hoping for a "happy" ending for the Ziller family, but none was forthcoming ... which, I suspect, is realistic and made the novel sing so truly.

The first half (Summer 1985 - the year I graduated from high school) was truly amusingly bittersweet and still gave the reader a sense of everything working out for this collection of characters. The second half (Summer 1986) dashed that sense into microscopic pieces, but I can't say I was angry, or upset ... for no matter how painful life is, we keep moving homeward towards an unknown destination.

I had a similar sense of resignated loss at the end of the Coen Brothers' film A Serious Man ... which, if you haven't seen, you should ... especially if you read Puchner's very human novel, which I wholeheartedly recommend.

Educational Musing #1

At times, successful teaching is nothing but a series of happy accidents.

Case in point: I’m closing the books on the final grades of the semester, and reviewing one of the last assignments I gave my American Literature classes: Compare Jay Gatsby from the novel The Great Gatsby to the star of Edwin Arlington Robinson’s poem “Richard Cory.”

Almost every essay I’ve read about the two men has made some excellent connections between the two doomed protagonists, and presented keen insights into what made Gatsby tick, as well as what might have caused Cory to go home one calm summer night and “put a bullet through his head.” So, I know this exercise in examining the two characters has proven fruitful. I have the evidence in my hand via their writing.

I’m actually getting that warm “successful teacher” buzz just writing about the experience. Was this masterful classroom planning on my part? Perhaps. Being familiar with your curriculum is vital, yes … but even though I’ve taught “Richard Cory” before, I’ve never made the connection to Gatsby. This time, through a happy accident, the spot in the textbook where “Cory” lies fell open during the same time we were reading Gatsby. Re-reading the poem, I made the connection, and in turn, revised the daily lesson plan to see what the students would have to say.

So, a day in the classroom proved to be magnificent thanks to random chance, and while I’m feeling good about myself in presenting the poem when I did, I’m feeling ten times better about the kids.

They "got it," and that makes all the difference.

Elvis Has Left The Bindery

I grew up with Elvis by my side, thanks to my mother's devotion to the man from Memphis. She bequeathed to me her love of all things Presley. Even to this day, I can still sit through and equally enjoy sublime material such as the '68 Comeback Special or utter dreck ala 'Clambake,' and find myself transformed to the hideous orange shag carpeting that adorned the floor of our living room on Badgett Avenue.

When asked by my editors at Captone to write a graphic novel biography of the King, I didn't hesitate to accept the assignment.

Click the book cover above to learn more.

Five A.M. Observations About Oz

So, if water melts a Wicked Witch, how does she take a bath?

I know from Frank Zappa that ships (as a rule) arrive too late to save drowning witches, but it matters not if they dissolve when placed in water. Salt water must really do a number on a witch's skin. All that remains is the pointy hat, and that alone is hardly worthy of rescue.

Or does she even bathe? And if not, is that why her skin is green?

Or was she belted by gamma rays?

Or does she just reek to high heaven?

And ... could you even smell her in a castle filled with flying monkeys? After all, only the Great and Powerful Oz himself knows where the turrets and castle corners are that might contain fistfuls of flung simian poo.

Margaret Hamilton, our lonely nation turns its eyes to you.

Good!

Instruments of Enlightenment

For every op-ed piece such as this one as reported in The Nation, I find solace in the independent publishers who beat back against the tide, including Winston Salem's own Press 53 (which I highly recommend you click over and check out this very moment).

Still, having been a professional working writer for - my god - twenty years this June, I've lived through so many permutations to smash into the venues in which I've toiled (newspapers, comics, children's stories, paperback originals, coloring and activity books, newsletters, etc. ) that the one constant I can attest to when it comes to publishing is this:

For all of the constant visual and aural noise we are consumed by daily, the written word will always have value, and books will always have the power to move the mind, body and soul.

If the delivery method changes, then so be it - but I'm going on record now to say the sheer tactile pleasure of the printed word vastly outweighs the electronic screen. If that makes me a book snob, so be it - lord knows as a collector I do so love to cling to physical objects (he says without a shred of intentional irony).

Okay, enough literary musings ... next entry will be more whimsical (I promise)!

Books Are No Passing Fad

Against all odds, a new bookstore opens with an amazing back story (and back list). Click the above photograph to learn more!

"Rare" Convention Appearance

I rarely attend conventions these days, but Chris Garbee of Untamed Worlds coaxed me out of con-retirement for the Roanoke Valley Comicon ... a one-day show in Salem, Virginia on Saturday, April 25th. I'll be there to hawk (er, sign) books and comics I've written, which range from recent Dreamworks hits Kung Fu Panda, Madagascar 2 and Monsters Vs. Aliens to earlier works such as Elfquest, Jimmy Neutron, E.T., The Ren & Stimpy Show and Explorers.

Hours are from 10 AM until 4 PM. Admission is $5.00 each and children 10 and under are free with a paid adult. The show has moved to a new location at the Salem Civic Center, offering a large con space (over 5000 square feet) with almost 50 dealers.

In addition to me, other luminaries include Andy Smith, Budd Root, Kevin Sharpe, Louis Small Jr and Matt Slay.

There will be an an art contest at this show. Paid admission is all that is required to enter the art contest (and a piece of your original art work, of course). There will also be free comics for the first 100 people through the door and hourly door prizes. The Salem Civic Center offers plenty of free parking, and, if you don't bring enough cash, there is an ATM on site.

Take Exit 141 of I-81 and follow the signs to the Salem Civic Center. And if you show up at my table and say "Pop Culture Debris sent me," I'll give you a free comic!

Why Neutral eBay Feedback Sucks

So, another week goes by - another one of the scant few Andy Griffith biographies I have left sells on eBay.

The feedback I receive to go with my 100% positive feedback record?

"So no one else is disappointed:Bk has no Photos+Andy didn't sign-his writer did."

Of course, this is neutral feedback and not a negative, but it still stings. I have no way of responding on eBay in public, so I was going to email the buyer ... and then decided I didn't want to get into a war of the emails with an unarmed opponent.

That being said, here is my unsent reply, and why I think so-called "neutral" eBay feedback sucks:

Dear Disappointed,

Out of over 200 other purchases of this same book on eBay, no one else has been disappointed. I never have understood why, if someone isn't pleased with a item, why they can't be bothered to let the seller know. The book's description plainly says signed by the author. It lists no photos in the book and instead gives the name of Bill Neville, the illustrator.

Instead of leaving neutral feedback a simple request for a refund would have appreciated, and gladly given if not satisfied. Instead, to demonstrate your so-called cleverness, you have to leave a snide remark "warning" the world.

Somehow, I imagine you are the same kind of dimwit who leaves negative remarks about authors on the Amazon site in the Book Review section when you are upset over slow shipping or condition (both of which, let me add, since I know you don't bother to read descriptions, are things writers have absolutely no control over - those complaints should be directed at the seller).

Also, if you had an iota of savvy, you would know that a true Andy Griffith autograph isn't going to be selling on eBay for $14.99 in the first place. Griffith rarely signs anything, one of a multitude of facts to be learned in the disappointing book you purchased.

Sincerely yours,

Andy Griffith's Writer

There. Venting complete.

Dying Is An Art, Like Everything Else ...

Anyone who knows me well enough to have read my poetry knows of the high regard in which I hold Sylvia Plath.

Ergo, a photo swiped from The New York Times website, along with an embedded link therein in which several luminaries debate "Why The Plath Legacy Lives."

Which is actually a rather painfully ironic title in light of Plath's death, as well as the recent passing of her son. A purposeful one? One hopes not.

Apparently, I Have A Fan ....

The Grand Comic Book Database Project

For friends and readers into comics, you can easily spend an afternoon enjoying The Grand Comic Book Database Project. I found a lengthy list of my own comic book writing credits (by no means complete, but an excellent start) ... even one or two I had forgotten about! Click the cover above to check out my incomplete resume!

The Future of Publishing

Some common sense ways to (hopefully) bring both readers and books into the technological age....

Sneaking In The Back Door?

As a writer of licensed property tie-in projects both famous (most recently Kung Fu Panda and Madagascar: Back 2 Africa), and obscure, I find the tone and quotes in this article insulting (please click the link and go read before continuing to enjoy my rant).

"Sneaked in the back door of publishing as a writer-for-hire," is how Judy Blundell categorized her career as an author before the publication of her first non-licensed novel. I'm not disputing the merit of the book (after all, it did win the National Book Award for Young People's Literature), but apparently she doesn't look upon the 100 or so books written up to this point favorably, choosing to use a pseudonym instead of her own name to sign the work.

I imagine doing so has hurt me at times, but I've always used my real name on projects. The only time a pseudonym has been on the cover of something I've written is due to the publisher (as in the case of the Deathlands novels I wrote under the house name of "James Axler"). I do agree with Blundell about "losing your writer's voice" by continually toiling in the creative houses of licensed properties, but I hardly see shame in the work done there either. Good work is good work, and should be recognized as such.

Trek Talk

Decent enough interview with the screenplay writers for the new Trek movie, although the interviewer comes across as a total gibbering schmuck (which is typical these days with web-based interviews, I'm sorry to say). Still, sounds like Kurtzman and Orci did their homework, and one of them is actually a hardcore Star Trek fan to boot. I have high hopes for the storyline, since this is the same team who wrote some of the best episodes of Alias (another one of my past television passions).

Stuff About Poe ...

... as written in a "round robin biographical recall" by my 11th graders:

1. Poe had a very bad childhood.




2. He was cursed.




3. His real mother & wife died at the age of 24.




4. His step-father didn't like him.




5. His last name was Poe.




6. Poe was 40 years old when he died.




7. He wrote short stories.




8. Poe lived in Richmond, VA.




9. He's dead.




10. His middle name of Allan was not used until after his death.




11. He wrote "The Raven."




12. Poe was most famous for his horror stories.




13. Poe's horrible life was the reason for the horror stories.




14. He was weird.




15. Poe's mother and wife died of TB.




16. He joined the military.




17. Hooked up with his 13-year-old cousin.




18. He had a weird looking mustache.




19. Poe could not hold his booze.




20. He liked writing better than I did.

What Are You Currently Reading?

Yes, I know Banned Books Week ends today ... all the more important to keep awareness of it alive for the other 51 weeks of the year.

So, with that in mind ... go here to get the basics.

Then, read a column about how "lucky" we are in this part of North Carolina not to have major issues with book banners and their ilk (ah, apathy ...).

For a good chuckle, enjoy the list of books that then-Mayor Sarah Palin supposedly wanted banned from the Wasilla Public Library (the laugh comes from imagining Palin actually reading even a tenth of these books that made the fake hit list).

And finally, in honor of Banned Books Week, here' s a quick quiz.

Hey, I Wrote That!

Meant to post this at the first of the month instead of the end, but here's the latest book to appear with my byline, as well as my first title from the fine folks at Capstone Press.

Available in both a hardcover "library binding" and a softcover edition for those of us on a budget. Of course, if one believes what one reads on amazon.com, they are both the same price. Yes, the listings for both versions of The FBI (Cartoon Nation) are riddled with errors such as having the wrong product description, two authors instead of one (Terry and Collins), incorrect creator bios and a listed page count of 2,660 (instead of the correct 32)!

I sent amazon a list of corrections just a few moments ago, but have my doubts how long they will take to appear. Click the book cover if you're curious to see for yourself! ADDENDUM: In less than 24 hours, amazon.com did correct the author's name, but the rest of the errors still stand. Stay tuned for further details (although I must confess to feeling positively like Thomas Pynchon at the thought of crafting a 2,660 page book on the FBI - and a book for young readers at that)!

Hey, I Wrote That!

Feel the Thunder! Kung Fu Panda Coloring and Activity Books from Kappa Publishing are on sale now! Choose from three 32 page originals ("Go Po!" "Panda-Monium" and "Kung Fu Crew") with a beginning, middle and end as I wrote 'em or go for the extra value meal that mashes the trio into two new 96 page configurations with extra pages written for a fourth unpublished book. I personally recommend "Go Po!" as my favorite of the trio. Be warned that the larger books don't flow as logically as their shorter cousins and come minus the bonus goodies (tattoos, stickers and the like) found in the glossier and shorter versions.